I had an experience last night that is the living nightmare of every working mother: our nanny emailed me at 10 p.m., giving notice, effective immediately. As in, she wasn’t coming to work today or any day thereafter. I have two young daughters, my husband was away on a business trip, and I had two choices: completely lose my mind or take action. To be perfectly honest, I did have a minor breakdown -- a mini-moment of experiencing utter panic -- but then I swung into motion. By mid morning, I had taken a brisk walk to help clear my head and lessen the anxiety, the job was posted on Craig’s List, I had emailed my close friends and asked them to spread the word that we were looking, and I had made arrangements through early next week. Our closest local friends all offered to help, my best friend even offered to come up from NY to take over (including the unbelievable offer to help with my younger daughter’s 8th birthday party, which is in two weeks) and I was feeling calmer and in at least some semblance of control.

So, what have I learned from this and how can this lesson help others? First of all, when you get any kind of unexpected news, try to put it into perspective. We lost childcare, but the girls are happy and healthy. Second, ask yourself what you need this minute to help you feel better physically.  Exercise is probably the best treatment anywhere, a sympathetic shoulder is good too, but chocolate has its merits. Third, dive into problem-solving mode. Determine what you can do right now to make this easier. Fourth, think about which of your friends and/or family can help out…then ask. Finally, after the crisis is over, think about whether or not there is any way this kind of event can be avoided in the future. I realized that I need to have some sort of reliable backup childcare plan which I can quickly put into motion if ever needed in the future. But this approach is useful for all sorts of crises: We rest easier if we don’t feel that we are living on the edge.